Bringing Home Bryant: Happy New Year

A new year and a new beginning. A fresh start. For our family it is much needed after an action packed 2012. To recap last year, we brought Bryant home in December 2011, January was spent at a million doctors visits, me and the kids were infected with mono in February, trip to Disney in May, unexpectedly sold our house in July, in August Jeff had severe allergic reaction and almost died on me the week we moved in to our new house, the kids started school in September, in November Jeff started a new job, Sara Kathryn had ear surgery and Bryant spent a week in the hospital recovering from his Nissen and feeding tube surgery. Wow it's been quite a year. I am exhausted just writing about it.

The month of December seemed to fly by with all the activities surrounding Christmas and other special events. We started off the month celebrating Macie's 6th birthday. She had a big party with all her friends in which she referred to as "the party of the year." I think I am in trouble with this little party animal. Amelia had her first Christmas pageant at preschool. She was so adorable singing "Away in a Manager" and "Go tell it on the Mountain." She knew all the words. She and Bryant continue to sing Christmas songs even though Christmas is over. Sara Kathryn had her follow up doctors visit for her ear surgery. We are very thankful the skin graft in her ear adhered and will hopefully stay that way. So far her surgery was a success and she is back in the gym preparing fpr her upcoming gymnastics meets. My brother Grayson graduated from college mid December. I am incredibly proud of him and his accomplishments. He has a bright future ahead of him. However it does make me feel old that my little bro is now out of school. It seems like yesterday he was born.

Little man spent most of December recovering from his Nissen and G tube surgery. It has been quite a learning experience for both of us. I think we have both been surprised at our capabilities. Bryant has had some gagging after the surgery so we had to do an upper GI right before Christmas. It was no fun. All turned out well and the Nissen wrap is still intact and no more GI reflux is occurring. So that was good news. The day after Christmas Bryant had his temporary feeding tube replaced with a more permanent tube (mickey button) because the little stinker had learned to open up the valve and let the formula out which created quite a mess in the bed. Three days later I heard a scream from the crib and the mickey button had come out of his stomach. Yikes, this was not supposed to happen. I went in to Super Woman mode while Jeff was freaking out. There is very little time to get the tube reinserted before the pathway to his stomach, aka stroma, closes up. If the stroma closes the G tube has to be replaced surgically. In the midst of Bryant and Jeff screaming all I could see were the four walls of the hospital room we stayed in for 4 days and I was determined not to return there. So I held Bryant down and reinserted the tube in to his stomach, fun stuff on a Saturday morning. Long story short we ended up having to get a new mickey button placed because his was defective. Go figure the kid has the worst luck. Since the second mickey button was placed we have been doing alright. Like I said it has been an experience.

I have determined I have a love/hate relationship with the feeding tube and all surrounding it. I love what it is doing for my child in terms of growth and health. Bryant is now almost 22lbs. I can't believe it. He has gained 2 lbs in a little over 6 weeks. It took 5 months for him to gain the last 2 lbs on his own. He has also grown taller. His footed pajamas don't fit and he wore jeans today that looked like capri pants. His language has also picked up. He is combing 3 and 4 words together and his developmental assessment last week was pretty much on target for his age. His hair is growing like crazy with all the nutrients. It had gotten so long he had ringlet curls. I had to give him a snip snip the other night. See before and after pictures below. I still can't bring myself to take him for his first "big boy" haircut. He is my baby even though he is 2.

The downfall to the tube feeding is that Bryant has significantly cut his oral intake of food during the day. We had worked so hard over the past year to overcome textures, behavioral and sensory issues related to food and control. Bryant had an one episode of near choking after the surgery and I think it triggered his old fear of swallowing and bought back a hyperactive gag reflux. On top of that, he is not hungry because he has received all of his calories at night. Feeding issues are tricky, difficult and take lots of time to resolve. I did not realize how much progress we had made until he has slacked off. To add to the complex feeding drama, he is 2 years old and uses food as a control mechanism. So this is my hatred with the surgery and feeding tube. We have seen him backslide on the eating which pains me. That being said if I had it to do again I would. I believe in the long run the Nissen and G tube was the best decision for Bryant. My pediatrician said sometimes you have to take a step backward to move forward. Unfortunately, I think that might be the case.

In light of the recent Russian adoption ban, I am very thankful for my little boy whom I love so much. It is disheartening to us as adoptive parents that there are so many little ones just like Bryant that need parents to love and care for them. In our time visiting Bryant's orphanage Jeff and I saw many faces of children that will be forever ingrained in my memory. These precious faces deserve a chance for a better life. Now due to politics this chance may never happen. Dreams are crushed and lives are changed all over relations between two countries. In my opinion children's rights should come first before any politics. Children can't speak or stand up for themselves. As adults we are their advocates. Decisions concerning children's welfare should not be taken lightly. I believe taking away a child's right to a good home is "just pain awful" to quote little orphan Annie. I know in recent years, mostly due to the media, American adoptive parents have gotten a bad reputation in Russia due to the few (and I mean few) adoptive parents who made horrible choices concerning their adopted children These parents should be punished for their actions. However, these are the minority. The vast majority of us who adopt from Russia love our children with all our hearts and would do anything and I mean anything for them. What person would want to take that possibility away from a child siting in an orphanage? These children are in desperate need. There are 740,000 orphans currently in orphanages many with special medical needs. From what we saw most were small, underweight and in need of better medical care. The orphanage workers did the best they could with the resources they had but this does not even come remotely close to the love of a family. As of now there are 52 families who have already been to court and are unsure if their child is coming home. We have been praying for these families caught in the crossfire. Praying that Russia allows these children who have been adopted in a courtroom to be with the families that want them so badly. I wish all the Russian people understood how much we value their country because it is our child's birthplace. We want to share with them our experiences there and share with them what we know about their heritage. We had an extremely positive experience in Russia and met some wonderful people who we miss dearly. It was enlightening to hear about the 20,000 Russian citizens protesting the adoption ban. These are the kind of people we met in Russian, good hearted, who had the children's best interest at heart. Let's hope the good prevails and these children will not be denied a family that will love them.

We are excited for what blessings 2013 will bring. Hoping for life to calm down and be more peaceful. I am learning that for this to occur I must change my perspective, have a positive attitude and get my priorities in line. By priorities I mean putting God first at all times and loving my family with all my heart.